Marie and Matt's Shared Life story

How Shared Lives helped Marie and Matt stay together

Marie and Matt’s story is one of familial love, resilience and stability.

Marie first welcomed Matt into her home through fostering when he was aged 2. Now aged 37, Matt has lived with Marie for 35 years. Thanks to Shared Lives, their bond has remained unbroken even after he turned 18 years and could no longer be fostered.

Marie’s journey into Shared Lives was a natural continuation of her role as a foster carer. She explained:

“Well really, it was the fact that I was fostering anyway and Matthew, who I was fostering, became 18. They can no longer be fostered at 18. Because Matthew has additional needs, Shared Lives was offered to enable him to stay in our home.”

Marie has fostered many children over the years, offering long-term placements that often lasted until adulthood. Her home has always been a place of warmth and stability. Matt has seen many foster siblings come and go, yet his place in the family has never wavered. Marie said proudly:

“Matthew’s been with me since the age of 2 and now he’s 37. That’s 35 years,”

Their relationship is deeply rooted in shared experiences and mutual care. Marie recalled one of the most memorable moments in their journey. It was the day Matt got his first job:

“The most memorable moment is the day that Matthew went for an interview, and he got the job. When he was told, and I was told, that Matthew would never be able to work.”

Aged 18, Matt began applying for jobs. Marie encouraged him to pursue roles that matched his strengths. After several rejections, she took the initiative to follow up with employers, determined to ensure that Matt was not being unfairly dismissed due to his learning difficulties. One application to the Hilton hotel did not result in the kitchen job that he had applied for, but the team kept his application on file and contacted Marie 3 weeks later with a role better suited to him. Matt started as a night cleaner, progressed to day porter, and is now the day porter supervisor. He has been with Hilton for 19 years.

Matt’s success has not only boosted his confidence but also inspired him to support others. He now advocates for his colleagues, encouraging them to be assertive and helping them grow in their roles. Matt has even offered to help other citizens within Shared Lives get into employment if they have the skills and passion to work alongside him.

For Matt, Shared Lives means stability and safety. When asked what Shared Lives means to him he stated:

“Nothing much, I just think that it’s a place to live where you feel safe. There’s not much to say because it is my life.”

His words reflect confidence he has in his home, built on consistency, stability, and support.

Marie’s dedication goes beyond the practicalities of care. She has always treated those she fosters as her own, staying in touch with their families and embracing them as part of her extended family. One particularly touching story is of Joshua, a “beautiful boy” that they fostered and later adopted to prevent him from being moved out of the area. Joshua, who passed away at aged 7, was deeply loved by both Marie and Matt. Marie shared, her voice full of warmth:

“He was the happiest little boy, and he loved Matthew."

They talked at length about Joshua and Matt’s other siblings and family that he met through Marie.

Matt continues to be part of Marie’s family in every sense. This weekend, he is heading off to Benidorm with Marie’s siblings and their children, his extended family, while Marie stays in Birmingham. When asked what he was looking forward to, Matt said with a smile:

“Sitting by the pool in Benidorm."

Marie is preparing to retire from fostering after her current placement reaches adulthood. She said:

“I’ve actually said she’s my last one, but she’s free to stay until she’s comfortable to move on”.

Reflecting on her journey, Marie said:

“It can’t just be a job. You have to have compassion, patience and understanding, like you’d have for your own biological children. I know they say that it’s rewarding work, but I don’t see it as work.”

Her pride in the children and adults she has cared for is evident:

“Some have so many problems. Look at him. Look how they progress. That fills you with pride.”

Page last updated: 10 December 2025